F.R.I.E.N.D.S

“Diye jalte hai, phool khilte hai, badi mushkil se magar duniya mein dost milte hai”

Tears roll down my eyes in gratitude when I hear this song and think of friends who have come into my life and influenced it in a positive way. Who do we want to be with when you are going through major crisis in life? When you want to rest your head on somebody’s shoulder in some of the darkest moments of your life whom do you look out for? Be it gossip about a colleague or complaints about your life friends are always the garbage bin you’re looking for to throw these litter in.

True friendship is built on two major factors – trust and unconditional love and acceptance. In fact it is the basis of any kind of relationship. I knew two best friends in school – Ramesh and Suresh who were really inseparable from each other. They even went to the same college and hanged out with each other even after college. Ramesh was dating this beautiful girl in our college. She was rich and snobbish and spoke only to a few of the guys in our college. One day the couple had a major tiff and was on the brink of breaking the relationship. Ramesh was totally upset and confided in Suresh about his problems with the girl. Suresh did his best in consoling and cheering him up but to no avail. Even he started feeling down and shared this problem with another guy from our school. Suddenly this story became the talk of the town. When Ramesh came to know that Suresh had spilled the beans he was totally irate and swore never to speak to him again. A friendship 10-15 years was broken due to breach of trust.

 I and my collegue Sanjay were discussing something about trust when he came up with a story. He and one of his childhood friends Vijay had a major argument over a money issue. The fight became so serious that they almost had a street fight. Whoever saw that fight believed that their friendship was over and could kill each other if they met next time. Both were naturally very upset about the whole issue. Sanjay tried calling him but Vijay was not ready to answer the phone. Sanjay knew he had to do something drastic to regain his friendship. He made a collage of all their childhood photos and left it outside his house. When Vijay saw this he broke down and called up Sanjay. They met, hugged and patched up easily. At the end of this story Sanjay told me very important thing. “Trust is like a bank balance. When you break the trust you withdraw from the bank balance and if the bank balance goes empty you break the friendship”. In this case Sanjay deposited trust again by reminding his friend about the childhood friendship. In the first case (Ramesh and Suresh), the bank balance went nill and friendship broke off. Suresh never tried deposit the trust again by trying to resolve things between him and Ramesh.

Unconditional love and acceptance is telling your friend “In whatever circumstances you are – bad or good, however annoying or irritating you became I will be there for you”. In this fast paced life and hectic schedules, it becomes really difficult to catch up with the friends on the regular basis. Some people have to relocate due to their job and lose touch with their friends. This is where technology comes into the picture. A SMS or a call would remind your friend that your still there for him. Remembering and wishing them on their birthdays, anniversaries go a long way to prevent empty emotional bank balance. Facebook has made our life easier to remember birthdays so pick up the phone and call!!!I started with a song and will end with a popular song that totally defines friendship

Yaaron dosti badi hi haseen hai
Yeh na ho to kya phir
Bolo yeh zindagi hai

Koi to ho raazdaar
Begaraj tera ho yaar
Koi to ho raazdaar

Yaaron mohabbat hi to bandagi hai
Yeh na ho to kya phir bolo yeh zindagi hai

Koi to dilbar ho yaar
Jisko tujhse ho Pyaar
Koi to dilbar ho yaar

Teri har ke buraai pe daante woh dost
Gam ki ho dhoop to saaya bane tera woh dost

Naache bhi woh teri khushi main
aree Yaaron dosti badi hi haseen hai

Yeh na ho to kya phir
Bolo yeh zindagi hai
Koi to ho raazdaar
Begaraj tera ho yaar
Koi to ho raazdaar

Tan mann kar tujhpe fida
Mehboob woh
Palkon pe jo rakhe tujhe
Mehboob woh
Jiski vafa tere liye ho

Are Yaaron mohabbat hi to bandagi hai
Yeh na ho to kya phir
Bolo yeh zindgi hai
Koi to dilbar ho yaar
Jisko tujhse ho pyaar
Koi to dilbar ho yaar